A 15 year old Afghani girl, brutally beaten, resisting her families selling her as a prostitute. She's lucky to still be alive. Her and the other girl in this report are a small fragment of girls who were able to fight for themselves. This is a problem with usually more drastic consequences as a large number of girls, women and boys are sold each and every year.
In 2010, human trafficking grossed an estimated 3.2 billion, thats more than Nike, Google and Starbucks combined. This is not a religious or cultural woman's rights issue with arab nations. Its oppression, selfishness and injustice.
Friday, December 30, 2011
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Just trying to spread the Holiday cheer... don't hate me
The Key changes are my favorites ;) I think this Piano player needs a medal cause they just kept going when a lesser man (or woman, thats right, its a PC Christmas today) wouldn't have been able to continue.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Monday, October 10, 2011
I don't know what to take this guy as. He contrasts himself from his liberal friend, then says the word "ass," I don't know if this was a serious thing or if this is oddly strong satire?!
Am I the only one who picks out that he exclaims that Kids shouldn't be put in a position to have to read anything that challenges what they believe? ....cause, isn't that what he's a proponent of? His proposal is only the same strategy only bettering his point of view instead. "But hang on... Isn't he proposing a good thing for Christianity?" I really don't think that that would be a good thing for Christianity at all... And I'm sorry to insult this guys community college education (thats truth actually) but all throughout history the church flourishes most under persecution, not organized-well intentioned brain washing. IF the bible is truth, and I believe it is, that truth speaks louder than theory and I can in good conscience allow apposing views around impressionable minds.
Am I the only one who picks out that he exclaims that Kids shouldn't be put in a position to have to read anything that challenges what they believe? ....cause, isn't that what he's a proponent of? His proposal is only the same strategy only bettering his point of view instead. "But hang on... Isn't he proposing a good thing for Christianity?" I really don't think that that would be a good thing for Christianity at all... And I'm sorry to insult this guys community college education (thats truth actually) but all throughout history the church flourishes most under persecution, not organized-well intentioned brain washing. IF the bible is truth, and I believe it is, that truth speaks louder than theory and I can in good conscience allow apposing views around impressionable minds.
Sunday, October 9, 2011
Thoughts from 32thousand feet,
I want to propose an idea, something I was thinking about the other day about churches. I hear different things from many small, usually old (in this case for sure, you’ll see why in a minute) churches. Every church as it gets a generation or two from its inception has a tension in it to stay contemporary, applicable to a world and culture that is changing all around them. There are some different ways to strategies away this tension: Youth specific (isolated) programs, Adding a “contemporary” service to your weekend. Some hire a new pastor to help the church “stay relevant,” Some take off their tie’s (those of us with no vertically distinguishable neck thank you) Maybe start wearing their Levi’s to church. Some change the music styles, or the church logo in the bulletin. Updated a web site lately anyone? Add a website for the first time, maybe?(welcome to 1990 btw) One popular way is to start adding into every sermon how far corrupt the world is, and is taking every church, except that one of course, away from the right path.
I’m a musician, and work heavily with churches. I’ve turned down a few positions of churches looking for a worship pastor (my bank account thinks those were all stupid things to turn down, but oh well) I turned these down not because I don’t like the idea of being a worship pastor, what musician doesn’t want a salary gig holding a guitar, where you don’t have to say, “Welcome to guitar center” every day? I turned them down because I sensed that I was being hired as an agent of change in their church. I was the push that was going to move their congregation to at least 1995 standards (modern was a far cry from possible really) I’ve seen this method used before, with some unfortunate success. Because what usually happens is, a split in the church, some people resist the change and are either left to complain or vacate.
The question I want to pose in all this, and sorry its taken so long to get to this part, is; Why is our goal to sustain a church? there is a famous “fundy” pastor that brags often how his church is something like 123 years old, and hasn’t changed the way they do church since its founding. (*Claps hands)... “well good for you “Pastor Schaap”...oh my bad was that supposed to be “Reverend Schaap?” I never remember.
Why is our biggest goal to make a church last a long time? Is that the point of a church, just to be around for a long time? To be traditionalists? When I look at this from the 32,000 foot view, I don’t see churches dying out as a bad thing, maybe its even a beautiful thing. “Do you even love Jesus?” you ask.
So here’s the idea that I want to throw out there for people to chew on. A group of Christians plant a church, they hire a pastor, and start “doing church” whatever flavor they prefer. (not universalism, just preferences) Many of their friendships are centered there, their kids are raised there. The pastor walks them through their lives, shepherding them as newlyweds, a young family, a “mature” adult, all they way to gray old and dead. The pastor in his youth went through, and did life with you. Matured in his role along with you. The church then dies with its members as their lives come to a close. Not a sad story, the church has a life much liken to its own members. And overlapping this story is a near identical tail of a church planted by their children one generation behind the chapters of this story. The churches may look as different as the generations themselves look at a family reunion. Are they so dissimilar? Can they be seen as the same thing still? Why should we fight for grandma to ware toms and learn to Dougie? Why subject your kids to the beauty and reverence of boredom and wooden pews? Things you love in church your allowed to love! Don’t miss that. Your culture exists strongly for you. And thats ok to bring into your church and express your worship through to the same God that I do. Feel free to express some feedback below, I’de like to know what people think...
I’m a musician, and work heavily with churches. I’ve turned down a few positions of churches looking for a worship pastor (my bank account thinks those were all stupid things to turn down, but oh well) I turned these down not because I don’t like the idea of being a worship pastor, what musician doesn’t want a salary gig holding a guitar, where you don’t have to say, “Welcome to guitar center” every day? I turned them down because I sensed that I was being hired as an agent of change in their church. I was the push that was going to move their congregation to at least 1995 standards (modern was a far cry from possible really) I’ve seen this method used before, with some unfortunate success. Because what usually happens is, a split in the church, some people resist the change and are either left to complain or vacate.
The question I want to pose in all this, and sorry its taken so long to get to this part, is; Why is our goal to sustain a church? there is a famous “fundy” pastor that brags often how his church is something like 123 years old, and hasn’t changed the way they do church since its founding. (*Claps hands)... “well good for you “Pastor Schaap”...oh my bad was that supposed to be “Reverend Schaap?” I never remember.
Why is our biggest goal to make a church last a long time? Is that the point of a church, just to be around for a long time? To be traditionalists? When I look at this from the 32,000 foot view, I don’t see churches dying out as a bad thing, maybe its even a beautiful thing. “Do you even love Jesus?” you ask.
So here’s the idea that I want to throw out there for people to chew on. A group of Christians plant a church, they hire a pastor, and start “doing church” whatever flavor they prefer. (not universalism, just preferences) Many of their friendships are centered there, their kids are raised there. The pastor walks them through their lives, shepherding them as newlyweds, a young family, a “mature” adult, all they way to gray old and dead. The pastor in his youth went through, and did life with you. Matured in his role along with you. The church then dies with its members as their lives come to a close. Not a sad story, the church has a life much liken to its own members. And overlapping this story is a near identical tail of a church planted by their children one generation behind the chapters of this story. The churches may look as different as the generations themselves look at a family reunion. Are they so dissimilar? Can they be seen as the same thing still? Why should we fight for grandma to ware toms and learn to Dougie? Why subject your kids to the beauty and reverence of boredom and wooden pews? Things you love in church your allowed to love! Don’t miss that. Your culture exists strongly for you. And thats ok to bring into your church and express your worship through to the same God that I do. Feel free to express some feedback below, I’de like to know what people think...
Saturday, October 8, 2011
Updating perhaps? lol (couldn't resist)
I speculate if this was for a youth gathering or something. Thinking what it would be like to be a high schooler in that crowd as they become "culturally relevant" ... I don't really know what this video was from so I'll just let it speak simply for itself I suppose...Enjoy!
Friday, September 30, 2011
New wonder drug...? ROFL
*WARNING* may cause near sided ness. Pew rash, homophobia, arrogance or hypocrisy. May cure some forms of audible swearing, but will lock hair and clothing styles in the early 90′s. Some extreme cases may result in mayrterdome, rolling eyes or Homeschooling.
Monday, September 26, 2011
Overdue thoughts from last week
One of the things that strikes me about the fundy culture even still is the weight they place on all the things that'll bring down a fortress. The heavy imparitive on how close we are to total failure with God. I think this all stems from great intent wanting to please God. I see so much of the Marry/Martha conundrum. Striving so so hard to serve and please God that they forget to enjoy him and just love him.
They've created such a drastic black and white strain where tension is not a force of grace. But a sign of failure. Any tinge of worm water is ike arsnic in their glass,Instead of a guide to throw in an ice cube.
They've created such a drastic black and white strain where tension is not a force of grace. But a sign of failure. Any tinge of worm water is ike arsnic in their glass,Instead of a guide to throw in an ice cube.
Monday, July 18, 2011
The Price of Chocolate
In the same way that guys place unwarranted expectations on woman physically; Woman emotionally characterize men based on similar unrealistic expectations in their own hearts. In an effort to be slightly less abrasive, I will concede the fact that its easier to see the problem of unrealistic physical expectations than unrealistic emotional expectations. Not only is the physical just naturally easier to see, but the response from the girls side is typically shaded with a spiritual clout and therefore given a pass like a lagitemite trump card ending any legitimate review. I understand and fully support people waiting for the right person and not "settling." But what I find happening is that there are many girls in the church who are waiting for God to part clouds, cue the choir, and drop a six foot four olympian built figure with great hair in front of her. The kind of guy who doesn't relinquish his well worn study bible from his hand to play with children... and of course you always see him playing with children. Something tells me that even if this were to happen, God will have to audibly say the guys name and forge the ring himself before a girl is satisfied to make a solid choice. A little over the top? perhaps...
I heard Jon Acuff ("Stuff Christians like") talk about this once. He asked a girl out but was promptly told "I'm sorry, I'm dating Jesus right now." (a typical response for anyone who has taken even a semester of bible college or christian school.) Jon responded in his talk with:
"In order for me to get you to the Outback, I need you to dump Jesus?!"... "I just want a blumin-onion, thats an intense situation to get 'Yahway up in the mix' in!"
Jon gives a great satire post on his blog called "Dating God instead of me". Here are some of Jon's translations of common lines girls give guys. It'll make for a longer post but there just too good not to include. (my favorite is #5!)
---------------------------
1. “We need to talk”
What this means:
Nothing good is going to come of this. When someone says this, they are never preparing to tell you compliments or praise your Frisbee skills. They are preparing to dump you.
What this means:
Nothing good is going to come of this. When someone says this, they are never preparing to tell you compliments or praise your Frisbee skills. They are preparing to dump you.
How to respond:
Tell her, “I agree. There’s a lot on my heart that I want to discuss with you.” If you say this, you’ll completely confuse her. I promise. Part of the reason she is dumping you is probably because you’re not good at sharing your heart. She’s expecting you to nervously say, “What do we need to talk about?” By admitting there are issues and essentially saying, “I have my own secret things I want to talk about,” you completely level the playing field.
Tell her, “I agree. There’s a lot on my heart that I want to discuss with you.” If you say this, you’ll completely confuse her. I promise. Part of the reason she is dumping you is probably because you’re not good at sharing your heart. She’s expecting you to nervously say, “What do we need to talk about?” By admitting there are issues and essentially saying, “I have my own secret things I want to talk about,” you completely level the playing field.
2. “Let’s meet at Starbucks.”
What this means:
She wants to dump you in public so that there will be roughly 97% less man tears involved. You might cry, you might get upset, but no one wants to do that in front of a Starbucks barrista.
What this means:
She wants to dump you in public so that there will be roughly 97% less man tears involved. You might cry, you might get upset, but no one wants to do that in front of a Starbucks barrista.
How to respond:
Keep this simple. Just say, “I would love to meet at our Starbucks.” She wants to meet on neutral territory. Don’t let that happen. Personalize it.
Keep this simple. Just say, “I would love to meet at our Starbucks.” She wants to meet on neutral territory. Don’t let that happen. Personalize it.
3. “I think we’ve grown apart.”
What this means:
She has grown. You have devolved into some sort of potato chip-eating, XBOX-playing, non stop texting orangutan.
What this means:
She has grown. You have devolved into some sort of potato chip-eating, XBOX-playing, non stop texting orangutan.
How to respond:
Tell her, “Thank you for noticing that I have grown. I disagree that it means we’re further away from each other but I have worked hard to grow. I appreciate your words.” She feels like you have changed in a negative way but is disguising it under the term “grown apart.” Call her bluff and thank her for the compliment she didn’t give you.
Tell her, “Thank you for noticing that I have grown. I disagree that it means we’re further away from each other but I have worked hard to grow. I appreciate your words.” She feels like you have changed in a negative way but is disguising it under the term “grown apart.” Call her bluff and thank her for the compliment she didn’t give you.
4. “God told me to end this relationship.”
What this means:
If God really told her that, there’s not much you can do unless you think you can battle the Savior of the planet for a dating relationship. But if she’s just using the Christian Dating Escape Clause, you can respond.
What this means:
If God really told her that, there’s not much you can do unless you think you can battle the Savior of the planet for a dating relationship. But if she’s just using the Christian Dating Escape Clause, you can respond.
How to respond:
Say, “Isn’t that the beautiful mystery of God? He told me the opposite thing. But then I remember that in the Bible we are told to be like children in our faith but also to put aside childish things. Who can fathom the seemingly opposite wonders of His word?” Go biblical. She just threw the God card and the last thing she is expecting is for you to agree. Plus, using the Bible is going to make you look extra holy.
Say, “Isn’t that the beautiful mystery of God? He told me the opposite thing. But then I remember that in the Bible we are told to be like children in our faith but also to put aside childish things. Who can fathom the seemingly opposite wonders of His word?” Go biblical. She just threw the God card and the last thing she is expecting is for you to agree. Plus, using the Bible is going to make you look extra holy.
5. “We want different things.”
What this means:
She wants to date other people. You want to date her. Those are different things.
What this means:
She wants to date other people. You want to date her. Those are different things.
How to respond:
You’re going to have to go a little Garth Brooks in this situation. Say something like, “Do we want different things? I want love. I want to laugh. I want to serve someone and hold someone and know that the greatest parts of me were meant to bring out the greatest parts of her.” But if you can’t say that without giggling, just ask her to define what she wants. Don’t let some vague blanket statement suffocate your relationship.
You’re going to have to go a little Garth Brooks in this situation. Say something like, “Do we want different things? I want love. I want to laugh. I want to serve someone and hold someone and know that the greatest parts of me were meant to bring out the greatest parts of her.” But if you can’t say that without giggling, just ask her to define what she wants. Don’t let some vague blanket statement suffocate your relationship.
6. “I don’t feel the things I used to feel.”
What this means:
Her emotional high has worn off. The initial spark has faded a little. In a good relationship this is where you get to see what it is really made of. In a bad relationship, it’s time to update your eharmony profile.
What this means:
Her emotional high has worn off. The initial spark has faded a little. In a good relationship this is where you get to see what it is really made of. In a bad relationship, it’s time to update your eharmony profile.
How to respond:
Say what a counselor would say, “Feelings lie. There are moments when I rise in the morning and don’t ‘feel’ like worshipping God. But in my heart, I make that decision. I feel different too. But love is not a feeling. It is a commitment.”
Say what a counselor would say, “Feelings lie. There are moments when I rise in the morning and don’t ‘feel’ like worshipping God. But in my heart, I make that decision. I feel different too. But love is not a feeling. It is a commitment.”
7. “I think I need to give this relationship up to God.”
What this means:
As mentioned before, sometimes when a retreat speaker tells the crowd to lay down something at the foot of the cross, your relationship is the first thing she will think of. So she decides to sacrifice it.
What this means:
As mentioned before, sometimes when a retreat speaker tells the crowd to lay down something at the foot of the cross, your relationship is the first thing she will think of. So she decides to sacrifice it.
How to respond:
Say, “I want to give it up too. I want to turn in the pain and the struggles and the hurt of our old relationship. I want to mourn the time we’ve lost and celebrate the time we’ll gain by allowing God to grow a new relationship. We will rise from the ashes like a phoenix or a worship eagle.” OK, you probably shouldn’t say that last sentence, but you get the point. Agreeing with someone is sometimes the best way to end an argument.
Say, “I want to give it up too. I want to turn in the pain and the struggles and the hurt of our old relationship. I want to mourn the time we’ve lost and celebrate the time we’ll gain by allowing God to grow a new relationship. We will rise from the ashes like a phoenix or a worship eagle.” OK, you probably shouldn’t say that last sentence, but you get the point. Agreeing with someone is sometimes the best way to end an argument.
--------------------------
I love what Jon does. Using satire to create thought. In many ways I wish I were more talented like that. (makes I'm glad that there are men like him.) But regardless if this is addressed with satire or more direct. It's something that exists in the church that buries a lot of its own people. I remember having dinner at one of my pastors house with a number of other college kids. The pastor said off his cuff, "the number one question I get asked when girls learn I'm the college pastor is 'Why aren't there any good guys here?'" ...To this all the guys in the room erupted. "Where have they been??" and as the impulse responses formalized to more words, the stories of Guys (this is a group of only leaders btw) asking out girls and getting brushed off/rejected using some of these exact phrases started passing around the room.
I tried to let Jon Acuff do the majority of the blog on purpose, Aka, he has the ability to speak with a better tone than I. (Especially in this arena.) I don't believe girls are even aware of what this is in themselves that is burning guy after guy after guy that may approach them. I hope this has spurred some new thoughts. I encourage you to have some conversations about this with your friends (coed I suggest). I also encourage you to explore Jon's blog for some more that he's written on this and other topics.
Friday, July 15, 2011
Best (*cough) rapper ever
Sorry to all of you who actually watch this all the way through. Although, I must say, the longer the video plays the more I started agreeing with him!
Thursday, July 14, 2011
Perlita
3 year old *Perlita’s eyes sparkled as I spotted her in the busy mall. Her tiny hands were clinging to a department store bag. As soon as the coveted hugs and kisses were given, she was allowed to open the bag, pull out and slip on the princess dress she had chosen for herself. This was the selection she and all of the other little girls under the age of 5 from the safe home had made. They had also chosen ballet outfits for their dance classes, and had found shoes, dresses and hair accessories. All their own. Just for them.
We caught up with the older girls who were giggling and running back and forth from the dressing rooms with their “shopping buddies”, exchanging sizes and perfecting their individuality through that one outfit that would be their final purchase. They had each been given a gift card to spend, and budgeting was an essential part of this day.
Lunch was at least 22 happy meals. Maybe more. Then the girls went ahead of us on a secret mission we were not to question. We arrived across the street a little while later and were ushered into an auditorium and told to sit on the first 2 rows as guests of honor.
The littlest ones had all changed into their matching ballet outfits and began to dance for us. They had been practicing their performance for weeks. They were so sweet.
Then the older girls took their places on the stage. The song started and it was nearly impossible not to let their personal stories roll through your mind.
Orphaned. Abandoned. Exploited. Abused. Suffering.
But as each girl began to share their gratitude and thanks through the one medium they all felt they could express themselves adequately through, their joy became more and more apparent. The song they had chosen was a message of believing. Of leaving the past behind and throwing themselves into the hope and the future they know belongs to them. And the result brought the kinds of tears that I hope everyone gets to experience at some point in his or her life. Tears of wonder and appreciation and hope. The kind of empathy that not only walks in the shoes of suffering, but as a result, gets to share in the joys.
This is the work you graciously support… you are empathizers.
*Perlita’s mother, a victim of forced prostitution and trafficking, abandoned her and her older sister. They live at the safe home full time, where they receive an education, quality care, love and understanding without measure. Names are changed for protection.
Written by Julie Riley
(re-post from IEmpathixe.org/blog)
(re-post from IEmpathixe.org/blog)
SUMMER EXPEDITION
The iE Staff and Interns relocated from Boulder to Mexico City for the summer. Joining us to collaborate with local advocates and our partners were 39 US child advocates whose ages ranged from 17-70. The diverse group included psychologists, students concentrating on research and case studies for degrees, PHD’s, lawyers focusing on anti-trafficking, various practitioners, and volunteers from all walks of life who are deeply committed to protecting and restoring vulnerable and victimized children. Our work included further strategizing with our partners, serving victims and at-risk kids, and influencing influencers in politics, including policy makers whose efforts directly impact this work.
Safe-home
Teams reorganized storage rooms, restocked the pantries and supplies, purchased the girls’ swim gear for their biweekly swim lessons, and they received gift cards to a department store so they could shop and practice budgeting. The girls also enjoyed two trips to the Aztec ruins and shared common meals at the cultural center.
Teams reorganized storage rooms, restocked the pantries and supplies, purchased the girls’ swim gear for their biweekly swim lessons, and they received gift cards to a department store so they could shop and practice budgeting. The girls also enjoyed two trips to the Aztec ruins and shared common meals at the cultural center.
Street Outreach
iE continues to maintain strong relationships with street outreaches to the vulnerable children populations in Mexico City. This summer, we began the delicate process of getting teen parents and their 5 month old baby off the streets. Other efforts included, visiting residential centers, serving and encouraging the kids and staff, cooking meals, playing soccer with the kids at both the Hovde and Alianza outreach centers. We remodeled, painted, and re-carpeted 2 bedrooms which house over 20 kids.
iE continues to maintain strong relationships with street outreaches to the vulnerable children populations in Mexico City. This summer, we began the delicate process of getting teen parents and their 5 month old baby off the streets. Other efforts included, visiting residential centers, serving and encouraging the kids and staff, cooking meals, playing soccer with the kids at both the Hovde and Alianza outreach centers. We remodeled, painted, and re-carpeted 2 bedrooms which house over 20 kids.
Your support makes these things possible and brings powerful changes to the lives of vulnerable and victimized children. IEmpathize is an organization that I believe is worth my money and time. I've seen them make a legitimate difference for real kids! If you have not taken the time to watch this short video, do it! its worth the 4 minutes of your life. It features some of the stories of the actual girls I met in Mexico City.
Mexico City: The Way Home (English 4min) from iEmpathize on Vimeo.
Sunday, June 26, 2011
Wrecked ... Mexico City
As my plane is banking into its finale approach into Denver, my stomach had been sour the whole flight; Not because of my finale street-vender-taco count of 26, not cause of air sick (I don't get that). It had been that way all day. Nothing in me wanted to step foot off that plane. Yesterday I got to hang with the most amazing group of girls!!! Each one is a story of beauty from the heaviest ashes. My head and my heart are going to be unpacking this for months, perhaps years. But so you can see a shadow of what I mean...
...see me at dinner, a nice mexican restaurant (not unlike many I've been too in the States) My table is packed, 9 people in fact... and less that half of us even speak the same language, but conversation was never a problem. I'm sitting next to the most adorable 4 year old this world has ever seen. She stole my heart and held my hand most of the day, and ended our evening asleep in my arms. You'd never know her past by her sweet deposition... never know that she was the child of a slave, who's uncle sold her for sex as a teenager. Who's father falls on the indistinguishable line of possibility between her mothers pimp or a number of "John's." ... And I got to dance with her! As a mariachi band comes into our dinning room an impromptu dance party was like fire that spread through the room. before the first song was over she dawning an oversized sombrero on her tiny lil head. I don't think there was a step of our dance where she wasn't in spirit with her 4 year-old contagious gut-laugh. And although the two of us stole the show (at least in my head) the dance was annotated not by us but by a 12 year old who was rescued from a brothel house only a year ago by the Mexican Police. She also had so much life in her eyes... especially when she tried to throw me into a pool and even legitimately beat me in a water fight (after we had both climbed to the top of the fountain that is)
I could go on and on and on but I just wanted to paint a picture of the woman these girls have chosen to be. Many of whom ware bracelets that tell their story, not of their past... but of why they have so much life now after having so much stolen from them. The bracelets tell the story of the man who loved them the best. The Christ who showed them freedom and love. These girls knowing better than any, what slavery is. Having now showed me what freedom looks like. They walk in it, chasing the shadows and choosing to hope, learning to dream again, every smile showing a vibrant life that cant be fabricated, cannot be forced or painted on. I may tell a small part of their story, but I didn't write it.
"Therefore this is what the Sovereign LORD says: I am against your magic charms with which you ensnare people like birds and I will tear them from your arms; I will set free the people that you ensnare like birds." (Ezekiel 13:20)
"Set me free from my prison, that I may praise your name. Then the righteous will gather about me because of your goodness to me." (ps 142:7)
"I run in the path of your commands, for you have set my heart free" (Ps 119:32)
...see me at dinner, a nice mexican restaurant (not unlike many I've been too in the States) My table is packed, 9 people in fact... and less that half of us even speak the same language, but conversation was never a problem. I'm sitting next to the most adorable 4 year old this world has ever seen. She stole my heart and held my hand most of the day, and ended our evening asleep in my arms. You'd never know her past by her sweet deposition... never know that she was the child of a slave, who's uncle sold her for sex as a teenager. Who's father falls on the indistinguishable line of possibility between her mothers pimp or a number of "John's." ... And I got to dance with her! As a mariachi band comes into our dinning room an impromptu dance party was like fire that spread through the room. before the first song was over she dawning an oversized sombrero on her tiny lil head. I don't think there was a step of our dance where she wasn't in spirit with her 4 year-old contagious gut-laugh. And although the two of us stole the show (at least in my head) the dance was annotated not by us but by a 12 year old who was rescued from a brothel house only a year ago by the Mexican Police. She also had so much life in her eyes... especially when she tried to throw me into a pool and even legitimately beat me in a water fight (after we had both climbed to the top of the fountain that is)
I could go on and on and on but I just wanted to paint a picture of the woman these girls have chosen to be. Many of whom ware bracelets that tell their story, not of their past... but of why they have so much life now after having so much stolen from them. The bracelets tell the story of the man who loved them the best. The Christ who showed them freedom and love. These girls knowing better than any, what slavery is. Having now showed me what freedom looks like. They walk in it, chasing the shadows and choosing to hope, learning to dream again, every smile showing a vibrant life that cant be fabricated, cannot be forced or painted on. I may tell a small part of their story, but I didn't write it.
"Therefore this is what the Sovereign LORD says: I am against your magic charms with which you ensnare people like birds and I will tear them from your arms; I will set free the people that you ensnare like birds." (Ezekiel 13:20)
"Set me free from my prison, that I may praise your name. Then the righteous will gather about me because of your goodness to me." (ps 142:7)
"I run in the path of your commands, for you have set my heart free" (Ps 119:32)
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Tuesday/Wednesday: Mexico City
You don't get a video today. most of the pics/Video I've been taking you'll never really be allowed to see due to the protection of the Kids. I could give you another monologue with my beautiful face but I just plainly don't feel like it, and your currently subjected to my blogging whim.
Today was pretty long. started early with a staff meeting as usual. And then off to wal-mart. We bought a LOT of groceries today so we could fix dinner for the whole Hovdi House and their staff, with us about 85 in all.
They currently house almost 50 kids. from age 3-22. I was working with a couple of the older kids yesterday. The Havdi House is a preventative safe house for abandoned/ abused youth. And I just have to say that these kids are the best things with skin on!!! One of the younger boys (10 years old) wanted to help me with something yesterday, I asked him to go get a bucket of water for me, but within a minute I had to run and get something out of the same room as the water. So we talked for a moment (kindof...again, I don't really speak spanish.) But both of us stopped watching the bucket as it nearly overflowed. I told him that I would take the water, but he pushed my hand away. "No Chris, yo llevo el ague." and this 80 some pound 10 year old quiveringly lifted a FULL 5 gallons of water on his shoulders and carried it across the compound for me; Not accepting a second thought and even traversing a small flight of stairs. No brake, no stop for a breath, In fact he was quit head high and fearless. Today he and I painted a part of the house. I was on the roof, and was on the ground, under stairs, and hanging 10 feet off the ground from windows brush in hand. At one point I looked over and he had placed his hand print in yellow paint square on his face. (I did something like that the day before) so I went and got a hand full and encompassed his little mug with my gargantuan digits. he tried A matching one but it looked more like I stuck my nose and lips onto a freshly painted wall. He did however get a near perfect one on the tip of my pointy lil bald head. (at this point I feel the need to mention that this roof that I was on today was the very one that earned me a nickname yesterday with a few of the kids... "spiderman." You see, I kinda fell through the roof the day before, caught myself on a beam and swung down. Before I hit ground, as I'm dangling from the beam I hear someone behind me say "spiderman"... I feel as though I earned that one)
I connected with three of the older guys yesterday; and Jeff, from the Huvdi foundation that owns the house said "wanna get teenage boys to like you, fall through a roof." and I got to hang out with all three of them all day today, Working and playing a lot of fútbol. The one I got to know the best is 18, with about a 10 year old sister. She's adorable. She kissed me on the cheek today when she said goodnight.
We received two peaces of bad news today though, the first and the reason that the older kids hung around today instead of going to school in the afternoon as their supposed to, is their van driver was in a serious accident driving back from dropping off the younger kids. This is the same driver that drove me home yesterday and many of the kids know him well obviously. He was due to have inter-cranial surgery this evening but they postponed till tomorrow. The second, and unfortunately worse news. One of our local contacts within the government, an amazing lady that I'll tell you about at a later date, Called to tell us that she had to shift around our schedule for the rest of our time here, A 13 year old girl being trafficked for sex was murdered today. Our friend, being head of the anti-trafficking reform has been involved now in the investigation. Sadly, the norm here is that the girl was an abandoned child who's family likely doesn't know, or doesn't care. I don't know if thats worse or better than for her to be one of the many children that are taken and then trafficked.
Tomorrow, (thursday) after staff meeting we will be going out to some of the kids that live on the streets still and seeing where they're living. Followed by my team setting up our trafficking exhibit at the attorney Generals Office here in the capital district. The Attorney General is the third most powerful man in the country (also third in line for El Presidente should anything happen to the two above him.) His office is also key any success with new legislation against Trafficking. And with that... I have a big day tomorrow, so I'm going to retire.
Today was pretty long. started early with a staff meeting as usual. And then off to wal-mart. We bought a LOT of groceries today so we could fix dinner for the whole Hovdi House and their staff, with us about 85 in all.
They currently house almost 50 kids. from age 3-22. I was working with a couple of the older kids yesterday. The Havdi House is a preventative safe house for abandoned/ abused youth. And I just have to say that these kids are the best things with skin on!!! One of the younger boys (10 years old) wanted to help me with something yesterday, I asked him to go get a bucket of water for me, but within a minute I had to run and get something out of the same room as the water. So we talked for a moment (kindof...again, I don't really speak spanish.) But both of us stopped watching the bucket as it nearly overflowed. I told him that I would take the water, but he pushed my hand away. "No Chris, yo llevo el ague." and this 80 some pound 10 year old quiveringly lifted a FULL 5 gallons of water on his shoulders and carried it across the compound for me; Not accepting a second thought and even traversing a small flight of stairs. No brake, no stop for a breath, In fact he was quit head high and fearless. Today he and I painted a part of the house. I was on the roof, and was on the ground, under stairs, and hanging 10 feet off the ground from windows brush in hand. At one point I looked over and he had placed his hand print in yellow paint square on his face. (I did something like that the day before) so I went and got a hand full and encompassed his little mug with my gargantuan digits. he tried A matching one but it looked more like I stuck my nose and lips onto a freshly painted wall. He did however get a near perfect one on the tip of my pointy lil bald head. (at this point I feel the need to mention that this roof that I was on today was the very one that earned me a nickname yesterday with a few of the kids... "spiderman." You see, I kinda fell through the roof the day before, caught myself on a beam and swung down. Before I hit ground, as I'm dangling from the beam I hear someone behind me say "spiderman"... I feel as though I earned that one)
I connected with three of the older guys yesterday; and Jeff, from the Huvdi foundation that owns the house said "wanna get teenage boys to like you, fall through a roof." and I got to hang out with all three of them all day today, Working and playing a lot of fútbol. The one I got to know the best is 18, with about a 10 year old sister. She's adorable. She kissed me on the cheek today when she said goodnight.
We received two peaces of bad news today though, the first and the reason that the older kids hung around today instead of going to school in the afternoon as their supposed to, is their van driver was in a serious accident driving back from dropping off the younger kids. This is the same driver that drove me home yesterday and many of the kids know him well obviously. He was due to have inter-cranial surgery this evening but they postponed till tomorrow. The second, and unfortunately worse news. One of our local contacts within the government, an amazing lady that I'll tell you about at a later date, Called to tell us that she had to shift around our schedule for the rest of our time here, A 13 year old girl being trafficked for sex was murdered today. Our friend, being head of the anti-trafficking reform has been involved now in the investigation. Sadly, the norm here is that the girl was an abandoned child who's family likely doesn't know, or doesn't care. I don't know if thats worse or better than for her to be one of the many children that are taken and then trafficked.
Tomorrow, (thursday) after staff meeting we will be going out to some of the kids that live on the streets still and seeing where they're living. Followed by my team setting up our trafficking exhibit at the attorney Generals Office here in the capital district. The Attorney General is the third most powerful man in the country (also third in line for El Presidente should anything happen to the two above him.) His office is also key any success with new legislation against Trafficking. And with that... I have a big day tomorrow, so I'm going to retire.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Sunday, June 19, 2011
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
So Far So Good...
Summer update...
Where to begin; even only sitting in early June it seams that so much has gone on this summer that I'm way behind on blogging. I just got back to Colorado from North Platte, Nebraska. I was doing the music for the week for a early middle school camp. And I just have to say... those kids are CrAzY!*%!! The first set, the first night and they were far from the deer in the headlights look I'm used to getting as the music guy. they were interactive, LOUD, and bouncing all over the place. I love Middle Schoolers, they will tell you when their wanting to be there or wanting to be somewhere else. There is no guessing with them and thats why I like them so much more than adults. All in all the week went well. Most camp weeks you see the end of chapel recommittals; and such. And I have no real authority to decipher what is genuine and what is hype. But especially as the music guy, I commonly get used as the emotional driver to fake or flimsy committals to God. And this week didn't really do that. Although there was opportunity for kids to do that, they seamed to be driven more to interaction. The stage time instead was joyous and fun, and I like that.
Moving on, I leave for Mexico City this saturday. I'm an odd form of excited, considering what the trip is. For those of you that don't know I'm with a group called IEmpathize going to advocate against sex and human trafficking in Mexico City. I'll be meeting with members of the Mexican Congress and touring different brothels that the Mexican Police have busted recently. CNN published a report this week about sex trafficking in Mexico City; with an estimated 10,000 sex slaves in the city alone, there were only 12 arrests last year. Anyone with a sense of justice should be shattered by these figures. and this is only one issue in one city on the Globe. The problem presents society with a mountainous traverse that no individual has the ability to climb solo. thats why the awareness of the issue is so important. But like always "its not the education we get but the empowerment we give that makes a difference to others." (-John C Maxwell) I think that best surmises the journey I get to take next week. Personally its more out of my comfort zone that I had to raise the money to go than the nature of the trip itself. The Business side of ministry is still something of work in process to me. Below I've put the shortened video from Iempathize about the work in Mexico City, I'm trying to keep this post more of a cleft note's type of update, so I'm gonna just leave you with the video and keep coming back to this site next week as I'm in Mexico City, I'll be updating here about the trip as I get opportunity too each day.
iEmpathize Mexico City Short: The Way Home (English Version) from Simon Scionka on Vimeo.
If you would still like to support the trip, were still short on funding, and you can do so on the link below. Then Click the "support me" link on the right.
Support Mexico City Expedition
Other than all of these happenings, I'm getting behind on school already, I don't know how a thing like that could happen taking 15 credits over a summer with all of this also happening. It just blows my mind.
And I've been presented with a familiar crossroads, to operate in my nature. turning down the opportunity to put down roots and do what society sees as the normal or wiser plan for the next few years. OR... in line with all my life decisions and flighty nature. To choose instead to operate even more as a drifter than I am now? Hmm perplexing choices. Roots creep me out honestly. So I'm at an impasse with wanting to be responsible but also being who I've always been and wanted to be; Active, extreme, and living a life like few have tasted seeing both the world being involved with people all over instead of an isolated few...we shall see ;)
The prospect went with an interesting conversation, one that I have with myself often, but none the less was a feature our dialogue. It was about the nature of this itinerant life style. This conversation was with a man that knows me well, and he observed how uncomfortable I am with settling in. weather that be with a normal job, a house, a girl... "its like your so used to change that your afraid to commit to anything that will keep you from the ability to be where you feel you need to be from moment to moment." I couldn't agree with him more... that is me (hence the tittle of the blog in case you were wondering)! And I mean that as a very good thing. I like writing my address in pencil (I've lived in the same place for a year and a month now... that's a record in a nine year time frame) I enjoy that I get to live a life outside of a 9-5 prison cell, looking back 10 years later and realizing you've only existed well and not actually lived. I get to experience life that few do... and what affords me this right. I pathetic gross income every year and zero stability. I can deal with that. So I guess the only thing on that list to figure out is the Girl part.... yeah... I haven't figured that one out yet obviously. (How emphatic can you make one "!" ?) Perhaps i'll post a blog when I get back from mexico with a girlfriend application section. Except I think the "need not apply" section would be depressingly limiting :/ ... Well 2/3 figured out is nice I suppose, story of my life! (lol)
Where to begin; even only sitting in early June it seams that so much has gone on this summer that I'm way behind on blogging. I just got back to Colorado from North Platte, Nebraska. I was doing the music for the week for a early middle school camp. And I just have to say... those kids are CrAzY!*%!! The first set, the first night and they were far from the deer in the headlights look I'm used to getting as the music guy. they were interactive, LOUD, and bouncing all over the place. I love Middle Schoolers, they will tell you when their wanting to be there or wanting to be somewhere else. There is no guessing with them and thats why I like them so much more than adults. All in all the week went well. Most camp weeks you see the end of chapel recommittals; and such. And I have no real authority to decipher what is genuine and what is hype. But especially as the music guy, I commonly get used as the emotional driver to fake or flimsy committals to God. And this week didn't really do that. Although there was opportunity for kids to do that, they seamed to be driven more to interaction. The stage time instead was joyous and fun, and I like that.
Moving on, I leave for Mexico City this saturday. I'm an odd form of excited, considering what the trip is. For those of you that don't know I'm with a group called IEmpathize going to advocate against sex and human trafficking in Mexico City. I'll be meeting with members of the Mexican Congress and touring different brothels that the Mexican Police have busted recently. CNN published a report this week about sex trafficking in Mexico City; with an estimated 10,000 sex slaves in the city alone, there were only 12 arrests last year. Anyone with a sense of justice should be shattered by these figures. and this is only one issue in one city on the Globe. The problem presents society with a mountainous traverse that no individual has the ability to climb solo. thats why the awareness of the issue is so important. But like always "its not the education we get but the empowerment we give that makes a difference to others." (-John C Maxwell) I think that best surmises the journey I get to take next week. Personally its more out of my comfort zone that I had to raise the money to go than the nature of the trip itself. The Business side of ministry is still something of work in process to me. Below I've put the shortened video from Iempathize about the work in Mexico City, I'm trying to keep this post more of a cleft note's type of update, so I'm gonna just leave you with the video and keep coming back to this site next week as I'm in Mexico City, I'll be updating here about the trip as I get opportunity too each day.
iEmpathize Mexico City Short: The Way Home (English Version) from Simon Scionka on Vimeo.
If you would still like to support the trip, were still short on funding, and you can do so on the link below. Then Click the "support me" link on the right.
Support Mexico City Expedition
Other than all of these happenings, I'm getting behind on school already, I don't know how a thing like that could happen taking 15 credits over a summer with all of this also happening. It just blows my mind.
And I've been presented with a familiar crossroads, to operate in my nature. turning down the opportunity to put down roots and do what society sees as the normal or wiser plan for the next few years. OR... in line with all my life decisions and flighty nature. To choose instead to operate even more as a drifter than I am now? Hmm perplexing choices. Roots creep me out honestly. So I'm at an impasse with wanting to be responsible but also being who I've always been and wanted to be; Active, extreme, and living a life like few have tasted seeing both the world being involved with people all over instead of an isolated few...we shall see ;)
The prospect went with an interesting conversation, one that I have with myself often, but none the less was a feature our dialogue. It was about the nature of this itinerant life style. This conversation was with a man that knows me well, and he observed how uncomfortable I am with settling in. weather that be with a normal job, a house, a girl... "its like your so used to change that your afraid to commit to anything that will keep you from the ability to be where you feel you need to be from moment to moment." I couldn't agree with him more... that is me (hence the tittle of the blog in case you were wondering)! And I mean that as a very good thing. I like writing my address in pencil (I've lived in the same place for a year and a month now... that's a record in a nine year time frame) I enjoy that I get to live a life outside of a 9-5 prison cell, looking back 10 years later and realizing you've only existed well and not actually lived. I get to experience life that few do... and what affords me this right. I pathetic gross income every year and zero stability. I can deal with that. So I guess the only thing on that list to figure out is the Girl part.... yeah... I haven't figured that one out yet obviously. (How emphatic can you make one "!" ?) Perhaps i'll post a blog when I get back from mexico with a girlfriend application section. Except I think the "need not apply" section would be depressingly limiting :/ ... Well 2/3 figured out is nice I suppose, story of my life! (lol)
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
If it bores you... it must be godly!
I watched this video almost two years ago, and haven’t been able to find it since despite a few wasted hours. Grrr… Recently it was found and posted on Christiannightmares, which is great for you… because now you can enjoy it with me (insert overt sarcasm here)!
I’ll give him this much, at least he’s not totally ignorant, he knows basic music theory. However I fail to see where in the bible God revealed this “Body wants to dance” doctrine. I’ve looked for it, yes, even in the ever touted King James Version (you’re supposed to lift your chin a bit when you say that by the way, who knew?) The only original source I’ve found this is in Fundamentalist Christian dogma.
As in all things (yes I do believe this) the bible does have something to say about this. In 2nd Samuel chapter 6 David is bringing the Ark back to Jerusalem. Which was far deeper than simply the return of a national Icon. The Hebrew people are heavily about poetry, and so they would not have overlooked the deep symbolism here. The Ark was the Icon of the presence of the one true God. And bringing it back to the Nation of Israel was also symbolic of the Nations reconnecting to God. And as the Ark was carried into the city after a long journey; King David, warring what was called an “Ephod” (A rob that was worn by priests, which was disgraceful for a king to wear because it showed his knees (*Gasp! I know)) danced through the city streets with the people in celebration of his people being Rejoined with the presence of God again.
You see there are things that are worth throwing a party for! There are things that are worth dancing through the streets! I’ve even heard it said (by a pastor) “It’s honestly a sin to not have fun.”In the psalms it tells us to “praise him with a clashing cymbal and a Gong.” To Praise with both a harp and Lyre (a first century guitar) And I’m sorry if being biblical doesn’t sit as pretty in your church. But I’m going to dance, shout, raise my hands, and dance with my friends when I praise a God who’s presence has been brought back to me by Himself!
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
As some of you know I’ve been involved in youth work for some time now in a variety of capacities: Youth pastor/Leader, working with inner city kids and incarcerated youth. My ministry involvement over the past few years has allowed me the opportunity to witness an ever increasing world issue commonly referred to as “social Justice.” This umbrella covers issues like Sex and human trafficking, Child Soldiers, and a host of victimized people used as prostitutes, drug peddlers, and unpaid labor forces all around the world. The specific issues vary, based on the Geographic and political situations. To give you an idea, human Traffickers alone grossed an estimated 3.2 billion dollars in 2010, that’s more than Nike, Google, and Starbucks COMBINED!
This coming June I’m on the first of three teams going to Mexico City with the Colorado based organization “IEmpathize.” Mexico is currently on virtually every top ten list for countries with human trafficking violations. While there, I’ll be from one side of the city to the other; spending time in some of the worst slums and meeting with members of the Mexican senate who are battling social injustices within Mexico. With great respect my team will be spending some time with residents of safe houses in Mexico City. However a large part of my time there will be spent on awareness education in Government, Educational and also public venues; using art, media and other exhibits to boost awareness to the issue within Mexico. These are key strategic efforts to confront the issue with lasting effect, as one of the main reasons human trafficking is able to thrive is its limited awareness.
For more information on Social Justice, my expedition to Mexico City or “IEmpathize” please visit IEmpathize.org or feel free to E-mail/facebook me directly. I would greatly appreciate your prayers for myself and the rest of the team going, as you can imagine this will be both a stressful and emotionally exhausting experience. I would greatly appreciate those of you who would like to be a part of the work by donating to help cover the expenses of making this trip happen. All Financial donations are Tax deductable through IEmpathize. I’m still in need of nearly $1,800, with our leave date steadily approaching. (The $1,800 will help cover air fare, hotel, and transportation costs; projects and advocacy events; gifts/items for the girls and safe home. And over 25% of the cost directly funds our Mexican child protection and restoration partnerships in Mexico.) Checks can be sent to IEmpathize directly (4845 Pearl East Circle, Suite 101, Boulder, CO 80301) payable to” IEmpathize,” Please make sure to write “Chris Cook Expedition” in the memo line. Pre/post trip updates will be here on my Blog with obvious omission of certain details to help protect the people on the ground in Mexico City.
Saturday, May 7, 2011
This is a great watch if you have the time!
Ok this is a bit long I realize but the full version I think gives the best look at what he's exposing. Derren Brown; has made a name for himself in the UK, he's an illusionist/mentalist, and also a sceptic-type whistle blower. Takes an ordinary man and trains him in the so called art of "faith healing."
Now I find that most people are skeptical of faith healers in general but there is a reason why it remains a multi million dollar industry every year, because there are people out there that need and want genuine hope. Brown does (I think) an excellent job in showing both simply and scientifically the methods of these con artist praying on people asking for help. I do wish his finale performance had a higher turnout, but I respect their decision to take a hit on the numbers to protect both the goal of the project and also protect people that didn't know the ruse. Well done Derren Brown.
Now I find that most people are skeptical of faith healers in general but there is a reason why it remains a multi million dollar industry every year, because there are people out there that need and want genuine hope. Brown does (I think) an excellent job in showing both simply and scientifically the methods of these con artist praying on people asking for help. I do wish his finale performance had a higher turnout, but I respect their decision to take a hit on the numbers to protect both the goal of the project and also protect people that didn't know the ruse. Well done Derren Brown.
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Lead 1: Ownership
I've had it in mind for some time now to write a small series centering on practical leadership. I don't know how many I'll do, and they probably will be spread among all of my other random blogs, but I've been thinking about this particular facet for some time now, and thats the concept of "ownership." On its own, it embodies the arching goal of nearly all leadership; but is also focused enough to give it also individual attention.
In all leadership the emphases is on the people about the task, and not on the task itself. Thats the key difference between a manager and a leader. Robert Townsend understood this when he said:
"A leader is not an administer who likes to run others, but someone who carries water for his people so they can get on their jobs"
Townsend's words convey the idea servanthood, not manipulative slave driving. Its seeing a need that the people under you have and providing for their health/benefit. A true leader is not just someone who can produce results; because truly , both success and failure surround the majority of the worlds greatest leaders. The merits of a great leader are seen best when they step out of the way. If a man initiates a movement; teaches a concept, or creates a product, success in many ways can be seen on paper, escrow, or real-estate. But to put a value on someone as a leader, judge what is done when the leader removes himself from what they initiated; observing the health of what is sustained following their absence.
What happens when someone steps back from pushing an idea/agenda and instead invests in the people they've instated; an opportunity is created for those people to have a vested interest themselves in what their doing. Whatever success will follow, your people can look on and say..."I did that!" Their hours of work, weren't just a paycheck anymore. They have ownership in the success of what once was only your vision. Much like a company that goes public. But the investment that you give your people has to happen before the success. to turn around from the finish line and say, "oh thanks guys" is nothing more than what they earned from before. As a leader you never pay back, you always pay forward. Glancing back from the finish line and adorning the people responsible for getting you there with a semantical pat on the back is more demeaning than appreciative. Your people see that they are the last thing on your checklist at the end of the journey, not the focus of the drive to get there. And believe me they can all tell!
So how does a leader go about giving away ownership of their vision? Easy... in fact, often so easy most leaders find it difficult. the quick answer is "vacuum." The majority of leaders, and to be picky, people in authority too. are those who exercise the courage it takes to be the first to volunteer, the first to venture new ideas or create change. That same courage however seams to be infused in them, causing them to keep stepping in, and stepping in and stepping in. In their defense their motives are good, momentum if neglected can end up in a variety of places. So most modal their efforts to confine the momentum to direct it to where they see the best end. See now your thinking like a manager.
A leader who steps in to solve every problem or correct every course robs his people the very possibility of ownership. It builds up the "leader" [notice my subtle quotations now ;) ] and demeans the people. It sets a precedence that each member on the team clear things through higher powers. Which when your in-charge makes you feel indispensable, and who of us doesn't like feeling needed right. We all like that right. Which is why John C Maxwell describes weaker leaders as failing to delegate. Only the strongest leaders will surround themselves with other strong people. Those who are smarter, stronger and more capable. Such a structure is a threat to most leaders. By knowing that you have competent people on task, a real leader can place trust in those individuals to take vision to conception. A roadblock to many leaders is that often the delegation and subsequent ownership their vision means that the steps to success will be decided by someone else. The majority of leaders tend to be control freaks [Ask me how I know]. Gen. George S Patton, a type "A" leader with courage and drive if there ever was one said this:
"Never tell a man what to do, you tell him what needs done and let his ingenuity surprise you"
He understood this principle of ownership. I've had the privilege to meet two different men who served under him; They'll will be the first to tell you what a son of a bitch he was, and yet it was the honor of their lives to serve with him. You see they don't read a history book and see that "Patton defeated Rommel;" and "Patton conquered Sicily." They own every victory still today, and Patton treated his men like they did from the day they shipped out.
For many of us who strive to be leaders leaving a vacuum is unnerving, but without it your people will have no need for their own incentive. There may be a more politically correct way of saying that today but its the usual truth. After your vision is cast, and competent people are in play towards its completion, a leader can really come alive; Investing solely in the people pursuing the task. Success now is bigger then the efforts of one man, no matter how loud they are or how much money they invest. And when the inevitable day comes when the leader steps aside, those who are personally invested wont need them there any more. They now own the vision and are striving themselves for its success.
In all leadership the emphases is on the people about the task, and not on the task itself. Thats the key difference between a manager and a leader. Robert Townsend understood this when he said:
"A leader is not an administer who likes to run others, but someone who carries water for his people so they can get on their jobs"
Townsend's words convey the idea servanthood, not manipulative slave driving. Its seeing a need that the people under you have and providing for their health/benefit. A true leader is not just someone who can produce results; because truly , both success and failure surround the majority of the worlds greatest leaders. The merits of a great leader are seen best when they step out of the way. If a man initiates a movement; teaches a concept, or creates a product, success in many ways can be seen on paper, escrow, or real-estate. But to put a value on someone as a leader, judge what is done when the leader removes himself from what they initiated; observing the health of what is sustained following their absence.
What happens when someone steps back from pushing an idea/agenda and instead invests in the people they've instated; an opportunity is created for those people to have a vested interest themselves in what their doing. Whatever success will follow, your people can look on and say..."I did that!" Their hours of work, weren't just a paycheck anymore. They have ownership in the success of what once was only your vision. Much like a company that goes public. But the investment that you give your people has to happen before the success. to turn around from the finish line and say, "oh thanks guys" is nothing more than what they earned from before. As a leader you never pay back, you always pay forward. Glancing back from the finish line and adorning the people responsible for getting you there with a semantical pat on the back is more demeaning than appreciative. Your people see that they are the last thing on your checklist at the end of the journey, not the focus of the drive to get there. And believe me they can all tell!
So how does a leader go about giving away ownership of their vision? Easy... in fact, often so easy most leaders find it difficult. the quick answer is "vacuum." The majority of leaders, and to be picky, people in authority too. are those who exercise the courage it takes to be the first to volunteer, the first to venture new ideas or create change. That same courage however seams to be infused in them, causing them to keep stepping in, and stepping in and stepping in. In their defense their motives are good, momentum if neglected can end up in a variety of places. So most modal their efforts to confine the momentum to direct it to where they see the best end. See now your thinking like a manager.
A leader who steps in to solve every problem or correct every course robs his people the very possibility of ownership. It builds up the "leader" [notice my subtle quotations now ;) ] and demeans the people. It sets a precedence that each member on the team clear things through higher powers. Which when your in-charge makes you feel indispensable, and who of us doesn't like feeling needed right. We all like that right. Which is why John C Maxwell describes weaker leaders as failing to delegate. Only the strongest leaders will surround themselves with other strong people. Those who are smarter, stronger and more capable. Such a structure is a threat to most leaders. By knowing that you have competent people on task, a real leader can place trust in those individuals to take vision to conception. A roadblock to many leaders is that often the delegation and subsequent ownership their vision means that the steps to success will be decided by someone else. The majority of leaders tend to be control freaks [Ask me how I know]. Gen. George S Patton, a type "A" leader with courage and drive if there ever was one said this:
"Never tell a man what to do, you tell him what needs done and let his ingenuity surprise you"
He understood this principle of ownership. I've had the privilege to meet two different men who served under him; They'll will be the first to tell you what a son of a bitch he was, and yet it was the honor of their lives to serve with him. You see they don't read a history book and see that "Patton defeated Rommel;" and "Patton conquered Sicily." They own every victory still today, and Patton treated his men like they did from the day they shipped out.
For many of us who strive to be leaders leaving a vacuum is unnerving, but without it your people will have no need for their own incentive. There may be a more politically correct way of saying that today but its the usual truth. After your vision is cast, and competent people are in play towards its completion, a leader can really come alive; Investing solely in the people pursuing the task. Success now is bigger then the efforts of one man, no matter how loud they are or how much money they invest. And when the inevitable day comes when the leader steps aside, those who are personally invested wont need them there any more. They now own the vision and are striving themselves for its success.
Thursday, January 27, 2011
...GRASS
Barefoot and lightly, the first step is taken, toe first and slow with curious anticipation, as you feel the first blades of grass beneath you. Soon your full weight is pressing down at this sea of green. Anticipation has been yours for some time now because this ground is now your ground. And you’ve longed to walk it. Traipse, galumph or frolic (when no one’s looking) whatever you pleasure cause this is yours and you’ve waited oh so long to walk it. It may have been in that first step, or it may have been a thousand later, but somewhere your eyes noticed the things in your grass that weren’t like the things in “their” grass. The yard down the street, the field a valley away, its wider, darker, greener, stronger, more mature, healthier, funner, more… lovely. And this is life(!)
... It’s a job,
It’s a toy
It’s a house a car
a collection
… a person?
We’re masters of packaging this conundrum. So good in fact I think we play the game unknowingly or trivially. Heck I just did it on my IPod (the grass was greener on the Mumford & Sons side) Many have done this with our carriers. We’ve all done it with things and places. All of these things, in my head, are neutral things, you could have [this thing] or [that thing.] Matters not, go with both maybe. *shrug… “why not.” If you want to many things you’ll indebt yourself for them, and that’s an inconvenience (not to trivialize debt, but in light of what’s after this it doesn’t matter.) Whatever the arena the game is played it stays just that…a game. My head has been stuck in this game play lately: In the past few years it seems I’ve sat in every seat. I’ve been a spectator, a player, the greener grass and the weedy side. (this metaphor is getting too thick, it’s ok I agree) And when we talk about the analogy we all know the ending. “the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence” Hop the fence a million times, back and forth and the elusion never changes.
Often times we don’t see the real conclusions of our decisions for some time, years if ever. My observance of my own life and the life of many of my friends as we navigate relationships has shown that we’re often approaching it with the “greener grass” mentality. We don’t call it that, and honestly in the moment I don’t’ think we see it as that. Now before I delve in I just wanna say plainly that there are reasons of substance for leaving a relationship; Psh! we all know that. So I'm not talking about those. What I am talking about is when we approach or navigate a relationship with "the grass is greener" idea driving their decisions, thinking that this person isn't bad, but I think I'll be happier with [that person] or someone they've made up in their heads as someone they'll be happier with, that they've recipied nothing but delusional frustration. I watched as a friend broke off an engagement with little explanation, only to be bounced from attraction to attraction that were never once reciprocated. Multiple friends of mine I've seen brake off relationships only to become depressed, pining back after the one they left or a previous interest. I'm sure none of this is as cut and dry as I just dictated, many of them I know are far from that simple. but as a principle I've seen this being an unfortunate theme when we are deciding the people we do our life with. And I'm not excluded, I had opportunity to continue a past relationship and declined, thinking I was being wiser to pursue someone different. My rational made sense, still does. The things that made our relationship not work last time were things I wanted different the next time around you know. I literally thought to myself, "I could marry this person, BUT I think I'd have a better marriage over here." What a mature decision I was making right?! Well it would have been if I didn't become the grass that wasn't greener down the road myself. How come a decision becomes right or wrong because of the outcome instead of the driving character behind it. I firmly believe that God cares more about WHO we are than what we do. And the "Who" that God is striving for us to become is someone who resembles himself. The bible says we are "made in his image;" We are capable of loving as he has demonstrated love to us. In all areas of life God gives us a better way to live. Romance is no exception, frankly I think God even lays a heavier emphases on the way we love. Here is an excerpt from Proverbs (19:21) , conveying an idea that is not left unsupported by the rest of scripture:
There are many plans in a person’s mind, but it is the counsel of the Lord which will stand. What is desirable for a person is to show loyal love, and a poor person is better than a liar. Fearing the Lord leads to life, and one who does so will live satisfied; he will not be afflicted by calamity.
The counsel of the Lord... Show Loyal Love... fear the Lord [in this]... you will be satisfied.
But Chris [thats me] you don't understand. THEY didn't tell the truth. THEY didn't take us seriously! THEY didn't _______. and yes. Your probably right. They probably did (or didn't depending) I'm not saying this idea is completely rational, I'm definitely not saying that its easy, what I am saying is that THIS is better regardless of the rational we throw at it. But when I look at this passage and read it knowing what else he says about love, "Husbands love your wives just as Christ loved the church" Which by the way he gave us a picture of in the marriage of Hosea and Gomer (the Book of Hosea) and I don't think any of our jacked up relationships look anything like that soap opera (although I met one man who had that same story, and he astounded me!!) God paints a super clear picture of how he loved all of us. As the husband of a prostitute, Guardian of an unwanted child, Rescuer of a whore... He pushes towards the unwanted, trampled neglected, and says I will love you Loyally, He's described this way over 1300 times in the Bible. You know how much easier it would have been for God to just call a do-over. It only took a mere breath to create us, but to redeem us it took a few thousand years of rejection death and pain to say to us..."I loved you loyally, and as I have shown you what love is, love each other like that too." And in my petty-ness I screw with love like a game? We have an intentional God who has such a bigger idea in mind for you than "I like his shoulders better" or "His last name just flows" (yeah you know you've done that, don't deny it) I'm not saying that you cant enjoy those things, I'm just saying that why do christians make these petty lists and miss the point setting the game with the wrong end goal on the agenda. This is my reaction to all of us that over complicate what God intended romantic love to be, simply an opportunity to become that "who" that we're to be. To display the love and glory of a God who loves loyally. And yet we make decisions by the greener grass on the other side of the fence which seams so much better to walk in. Notice that God isn't denying that the grass probably is greener, so there you go, *pats on the head, "way to be right"... what he's saying is: "your missing all of what I intend to do"... "I want to make you a better gardener." don't we all want that? To be in a place where between myself and my spouse I know there is security and commitment to become better caretakers of one another? That no matter what our marriage may look like I at least know who to invest my heart in? I don't say that lightly, my own insecurities scoff at even the idea of that being a reality, if you don't know me or my story than your missing the largest exclamation point I could draw. I don't have this in my life, many of you don't either. But its what I see described in the bible, so it must be both better, and possible! And if possible... than its who I want to be. To not be treated like mere grass anymore, to be walked on, shitted on then neglected. To have the person I love someday to help me become a better gardener. and after seasons of success and failure pass and pass, to walk on a lawn with her that is both healthy... lovely... and ours!
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